In The Eye of the Storm
The Virtues of Equanimity and Compassion
From Radical Grace Vol. 22, No. 3, July-September 2009, the quarterly publication of The Center for Action and Contemplation.
Life offers no promises, and certainly gives no guarantees. No matter how fortunate we are in terms of health, wealth, intelligence, or in having a close and supportive circle of family, friends, and loved ones who cherish us, sooner or later, great suffering will also be part of the picture.
The fact that we exist in the domain of form and time where everything changes and, ultimately, where nothing can be held on to, means that we will lose whatever blessings and sense of stability we may have. As we get older, not only does our body deteriorate in various ways causing us pain and suffering, but so do the bodies of our loved ones, our children, and even our pets. It is often remarked that the suffering of those we love is much more difficult to bear than our own suffering. To witness our own decline is painful, but to see pain and suffering in those we love can be virtually unbearable.
The only way out of this inexorable state is to attain a radical acceptance of reality just as it is (experienced in the Enneagram Virtue of Acceptance of type One). The Six’s Virtues, Courage and Faithfulness, are also important for accepting reality as it is. Indeed, all nine Virtues of the Enneagram are immensely powerful sources of solace and healing to the suffering human heart, although they will have to be discussed in another article.
The fundamental and most comprehensive way out of the suffering that human life inevitably presents us is through the practice of non-attachment. The less attached we are to any form, to any person or quality in ourselves or others—or even to life itself—the less we are subject to suffering. Non-attachment brings freedom from suffering because we are no longer invested in the continued existence of any created thing for our own happiness and well-being. Non-attachment does not devalue the importance or beauty of anything or anyone, but it puts everything in its proper perspective: every form is an expression of non- dual Divine reality which underlies and gives value to everything, including ourselves. From this perspective, we do not need anything (in the absolute sense) to be whole or happy—and to not suffer as a consequence of its absence.
Non-attachment also activates Equanimity (in type Four) and Compassion (in type Five). Of course, all nine Virtues of the Enneagram are universal (and there are more Virtues than the nine generally associated with the Enneagram). However, these nine are antidotes to the nine Passions, or distortions of the heart (the very core of our being and source of our attachments, and hence of our suffering). If the Passions (or sources of suffering as the Latin word “passus” suggests) are distortions of the fearful, empty, desperate, and distorted heart—the Virtues (or “strengths” as the Latin “virtus” suggests) come to our aid after our heart has been purified.
Purification of the heart can, of course, happen in different ways—although Gurdjieff and other spiritual teachers (including Richard Rohr and us) suggest that conscious suffering tempered by full acceptance as well as conscious, unconditional love with Presence are two of the most effective means of purifying our heart of its attachments and of its egoic suffering.
Purification through love is a subtle thing since we so easily persuade ourselves that it is we who love, and that our love is helping others by coming from our own purified heart. The fact is, however, that the ego cannot love; it can only suffer in ignorance. As we become more conscious and awake, we see that love purifies us only to the degree that we accept it deeply into the core of ourselves. Love, especially Divine Love, comes from outside our ego-shell, from outside our personality, and cracks it open like a hammer smashing the shell of a nut. The heart is then laid bare to be nourished and to offer real nourishment to others.
The two Virtues of Equanimity and Compassion then become more available to the person whose ego-shell has been smashed either by great suffering or by great love—or by both. As we become more conscious, even in the higher Levels of Development of our type (that is Levels 1 to 3), we gradually become disidentified from our personality, and we experience the Virtues of Equanimity and Compassion more frequently—and more genuinely.
Equanimity allows us to be conscious of any emotion as it arises in our experience. It allows us to witness not only our dis-identification from our ego-self with complete composure. It also allows us to witness our own not knowing who we are, as well as the ability to live without labels or expectations, to interact with the world without emotional reactivity, frustration, anger, or any other form of acting out. Equanimity allows us to be not merely a witness to our life but an active, engaged participant in it because we do not fear being hurt and inadvertently increasing our own suffering by “getting our hands dirty” with engagement in the world and the necessarily messy business of bringing truth and love to personality-bound, deeply-defended, fearful people.
Equanimity also allows us to be enriched and transformed by the events of our lives. It gives us the inner peace and space to taste and digest our experiences, even painful ones, without being "storm-tossed" by every feeling. With Equanimity, we find purpose and meaning in even the greatest human sufferings, realizing that they do not diminish or destroy who we really are. In fact, they renew us and keep our hearts oriented to the real and unshakable Mystery at the center of it all.
Once Equanimity has given us emotional stability and a kind of fearlessness in the face of human suffering, then Compassion can go to work. (Actually, of course, these things are not sequential, but arise with all of the Virtues simultaneously.) If Equanimity allows us to stand firm amidst the swirling emotional upheavals inside and outside of ourselves as our ego-shells crack open, laying us bare to great love and great suffering, then Compassion allows our hearts to go out to others who are still enveloped in their own ignorance and self-created suffering. Compassion engages our heart, connecting us to the suffering of others—indeed, to all human suffering—although without a hint of superiority or detached distance. Compassion takes absolutely seriously the suffering it sees since that suffering is real (at least to those caught in its illusory web). Compassion also moves the awakened and purified heart not merely to see and understand the sources of suffering of others, but to actually do whatever is possible to alleviate it. Most often we tend to think of Compassion as something of a “passive” Virtue—being closer to contemplation than to action. But true Compassion is always active, although in the most subtle and discrete of ways. It throws itself into the action of healing and redemption however it can.
Ironically, if Equanimity frees us from the sting and debilitations of suffering, Compassion throws us right back into the middle of the action—into the “eye of the storm” of human suffering. To survive the storm and be vessels of Grace, both are necessary, as are all of the Virtues.
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