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transformer
Member
488 Posts |
 Posted - 27 Oct 2009 : 9:57:54 PM
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| Im having trouble telling these two apart. My mom is one of these two, just not sure which one. Anything to look for in telling these two apart? |
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Rich
Member
USA
2248 Posts |
Posted - 27 Oct 2009 : 10:09:27 PM
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Being married to a SP-2W1, I would say that the 2W1 is much more likely to do practical things for you. The 2W3 having a 3 component is ambitious, wants to be noticed and get attention, and wants to share themselves, that is spend time on you....
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ISTJ & SP-3W4
Serious-Sensitive-Inventive-Leisurely Styles
HER:Self Sacrificing-Dramatic-Conscientious-Aggressive styles SP-2W1 ISFJ
My philosophy of life: Love will get you through.
I learned to dissemble at an early age. |
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Classi
Member
331 Posts |
Posted - 28 Oct 2009 : 4:37:10 PM
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One of my close friends is sp/sx 2w1 I think. I've known a fair few 2w3s but from the looks of things they were mostly sx and so firsters.
my sp/sx 2w1 friend....
-very practical, tends to give people lifts in her car, plan days out and doesn't tend to look for praise openly.
-She comes accross as incredibly modest.
-Is giggly and fairly laid back in person, but also characterised but an undercurrent of sadness/moodiness. Often complains of feeling alone, wanting hugs.
-Very into art and at any birthday oppurtunity would make photo albums with pictures of you and her together for gifts.
-Very very quiet, although could be unexpectedly loud. Very shy, tended to get on better with boys.
-Tendency to have very long term close relationships which involved alot of physical intimacy, closeness, there would be arguements sometimes for various reasons, recently because her current boyfriend won't get a job.
-Constantly baking, (sorry for the cliche) but she was.
-could get angry over teasing, and hit people, but in a way which wasn't aggressive, didn't really hold grudges.
-Pretty resilient, could cope with alot, didn't complain much
That's all I can think of for now, I would imagine the main difference between sp w3 and sp w1 would be smoothness. 2W3 is more image aware, has more energy, would perhaps be able to boss people around to achieve practical aims (housekeeping) without ruffling any feathers due to good people skills. 
The so first 2s I have known, mostly w3 were the most charming people I've known.
The one sx first 2 I knew was terrifying, I would rather fight with an 8 than them  |
Edited by - Classi on 28 Oct 2009 4:38:50 PM |
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koolkatkuhner
Member
3777 Posts |
Posted - 02 Nov 2009 : 6:15:50 PM
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quote:
sp 2w1 vs sp2w3
School teacher of all school teachers vs. Teacher's pet of all pets...2w3s have more histrionic core...starts tearing up out of the blue...bit batty at times...sometimes overcompensates in the head center...intellectually stimulated minus the perceptive rigor of a head type. 2w1s run a tighter ship. More indispensable to needs as opposed to wants.
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Rich
Member
USA
2248 Posts |
Posted - 02 Nov 2009 : 7:31:11 PM
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[quote]Originally posted by koolkatkuhner
2W1s run a tighter ship. More indispensable to needs as opposed to wants.
*** Koolkat, I would also say that 2W1s can't ask for praise and rewards, and are in serious danger of being taken advantage of, and then exploited for as much as they are willing to do.... 
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ISTJ & SP-3W4
Serious-Sensitive-Inventive-Leisurely Styles
HER:Self Sacrificing-Dramatic-Conscientious-Aggressive styles SP-2W1 ISFJ
My philosophy of life: Love will get you through.
I learned to dissemble at an early age. |
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Classi
Member
331 Posts |
Posted - 03 Nov 2009 : 03:53:36 AM
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I want to discuss twos now, so I'll keep bumping this thread! I suddenly realised last night reading this board that twos are the most common type in my life, I've known about 10 very well and yet I've never shared my knowledge or attempted to understand them enneagramically. I must be some kind of two magnet, maybe I'm such a mess that they all try and rescue me at once, I dunno. So I'll contribute here as memories spring or ideas come.
Biggest differences I've noted between 2w1 and 2w3
-2w1 is more prone to care about being nice, if they're angry they'll stew, if a 2w3 is angry they're more likely to confront you.
-2w1s ironically as they have the gut wing, and not the image wing, 2w1s tend to embarrass easier whereas w3s tends to say whatever they want.
-2w1s tend to idealise people...not see their flaws, almost like a nine, and I can't explain it as type 1 is all about seeing flaws..
2w3 is more critical.
-2w3s generally have more opinions in my experience, and strong ones at that. One I knew held that "bisexuality doesn't exist", another would angrily preach "All catholics are murderous scumbags". 2w1s tended to want to appear fair and balanced. OK I'm starting to see that I'm painting 2w3s as the bad guys, and I think I'm biased as I liked the 2w1s in my life better. Just my experiences though, the twos I've met represent 0.0001 % of the world's twos, and this reply is rushed tbh
-2w1s had terrible anxiety ime, nearly all were worriers, and would somatocise alot, the tendency to complain about aches and pains due to stress was more prevalent. Kind of like 6s, running on stress while complaining about it. 2w3 is definately more confident, very very practical, come accross like 7s in how quick they can learn.
-The 2w3s I knew consistently complained of feeling "left out", being in on the crowd and the gossip were important, 2w1s would simply complain of being lonely.
-2w1s I knew would adopt people. They would sometimes make people dependent on them in mother/child like relationships. 2w3s don't seem to do this.
-2w3s I knew had strong connections to 8, 2w1s seemed to be more influenced by four.
-Both almost psychic in their ability to detect what you need and want, I have been spooked by twos more than once. You'll find they buy you exactly what you want for your birthday...I've always had bad back tension due to anxiety and I once knew a two who seemed to want to give me massages all the time.
-Obviously there was ALOT of variation amongst the twos I knew, I'm trying to get the heart of the differences between the two wings. One 2w1 I knew was like a hyperactive spoilt child who was obsessed with being seen as a "princess" and lived on a diet of sweets and biscuits at age 20. Another was the most down to earth person I've known, so funny, modest and easy to get on with. One things I've learnt from the enneagram is the quixotic bizzareness of how people can be so alike and yet so similiar...
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Edited by - Classi on 03 Nov 2009 04:01:24 AM |
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koolkatkuhner
Member
3777 Posts |
Posted - 03 Nov 2009 : 04:15:57 AM
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| sp2w3...teacher's little helper...so2w3...daddy's little performer. |
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manda7panda
Member
178 Posts |
Posted - 03 Nov 2009 : 08:57:58 AM
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Classi, much of what you've said about 2w1 is true of me.
quote:
Originally posted by Classi
-2w1 is more prone to care about being nice, if they're angry they'll stew, if a 2w3 is angry they're more likely to confront you.
-2w1s ironically as they have the gut wing, and not the image wing, 2w1s tend to embarrass easier whereas w3s tends to say whatever they want.
-2w1s tend to idealise people...not see their flaws, almost like a nine, and I can't explain it as type 1 is all about seeing flaws..
2w3 is more critical.
I tend to have the extremes... idealizing, or else being overly focused on faults. I noticed some years ago that I kind of had a mental "good guys" folder and a mental "bad guys" folder and would not allow myself to acknowledge anything negative about the people in the "good guys" folder. Allowing a person's good and bad traits - and my positive and negative feelings about the person - to mingle, is something I'm having to practice. Maybe that's the tie-in to 1... trying to keep a stark line between "good" and "bad" instead of allowing them to mix and coexist.
-2w1s had terrible anxiety ime, nearly all were worriers, and would somatocise alot, the tendency to complain about aches and pains due to stress was more prevalent. Kind of like 6s, running on stress while complaining about it. 2w3 is definately more confident, very very practical, come accross like 7s in how quick they can learn.
I don't think I run on stress in the sense of feeling energized, but for much of my life I thought stress was proof that you were "responsible." My superego really gave me grief when I started allowing myself to relax and veg sometimes.
-The 2w3s I knew consistently complained of feeling "left out", being in on the crowd and the gossip were important, 2w1s would simply complain of being lonely.
-2w1s I knew would adopt people. They would sometimes make people dependent on them in mother/child like relationships. 2w3s don't seem to do this.
-2w3s I knew had strong connections to 8, 2w1s seemed to be more influenced by four.
I definitely experience both, but more of the 4 than the 8. My superego and fear of rejection both fear expressing the aggressive/combative 8 behaviors, so I sometimes compensate by going into a somewhat 4-like blue funk. The "stewing" relates to this also. I stew because I don't feel free to level you with my fury.
-Both almost psychic in their ability to detect what you need and want, I have been spooked by twos more than once. You'll find they buy you exactly what you want for your birthday...I've always had bad back tension due to anxiety and I once knew a two who seemed to want to give me massages all the time.
I take a lot of pride in remembering what people have expressed a liking/desire for and getting it for them. Even if I don't know and have to ask what you want, I take pride in cutting no corners, even giving better than what you would have bought for yourself. I love to give massages... it gives me a way to feel physically close while "giving" and not making any demands on you.
2w1 - ENFP |
Edited by - manda7panda on 03 Nov 2009 09:00:49 AM |
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manda7panda
Member
178 Posts |
Posted - 03 Nov 2009 : 10:53:28 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by Classi
I must be some kind of two magnet, maybe I'm such a mess that they all try and rescue me at once, I dunno.
Of course I can't speak about you and your E2 friends specifically, but for myself I'll say there is a LOT more that attracts me to 4's than the rescue thing. 4's are able to understand/share our emphasis on emotions... you don't have that big superego thing going so much, so you can give us some help in taking ours off that throne... there's an intuitive recognition that it's not necessary to impress the 4 through image (because you people see through those personas anyway)... when a 4 accepts me it is a very powerful, intense feeling... maybe also 4's and 2's somehow sense in each other aspects of ourselves that have gone unacknowledged or unappreciated. Also, you are able to appreciate much of what we wish to offer, which creates a feeling of "clicking." But you don't just see us as a walking handout, you still see us as ourselves (type 4 emphasis on authenticity). I think in general you tend to encourage us to be ourselves, which goes along with countering the superego. Actually 2's deeply want to just relax and be ourselves, be unguarded... part of our connection with our own inner 4 that we need to regain. There's also a bit of fascination/mystery/challenge to discovering you, your inner world, and a feeling of being very special to be allowed inside there. So there are a few things fwiw.
2w1 - ENFP |
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Classi
Member
331 Posts |
Posted - 04 Nov 2009 : 10:17:15 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by manda7panda
I tend to have the extremes... idealizing, or else being overly focused on faults. I noticed some years ago that I kind of had a mental "good guys" folder and a mental "bad guys" folder and would not allow myself to acknowledge anything negative about the people in the "good guys" folder. Allowing a person's good and bad traits - and my positive and negative feelings about the person - to mingle, is something I'm having to practice. Maybe that's the tie-in to 1... trying to keep a stark line between "good" and "bad" instead of allowing them to mix and coexist.
2w1 - ENFP
Very Very much like my friend. She'll take what I think to be irrational dislikes to people. She doesn't act out, just holds a kind of "thing" against them. Its a point I should have made in my earlier comparison. What spurs you to put people into the "bad guys" category? With my friend the decision is made from, what I can gather to be general impressions or often because she thinks they have rejected her or are stuck up (they think too highly of themlselves). |
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Classi
Member
331 Posts |
Posted - 04 Nov 2009 : 10:20:31 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by manda7panda
quote:
Originally posted by Classi
I must be some kind of two magnet, maybe I'm such a mess that they all try and rescue me at once, I dunno.
Of course I can't speak about you and your E2 friends specifically, but for myself I'll say there is a LOT more that attracts me to 4's than the rescue thing. 4's are able to understand/share our emphasis on emotions... you don't have that big superego thing going so much, so you can give us some help in taking ours off that throne... there's an intuitive recognition that it's not necessary to impress the 4 through image (because you people see through those personas anyway)... when a 4 accepts me it is a very powerful, intense feeling... maybe also 4's and 2's somehow sense in each other aspects of ourselves that have gone unacknowledged or unappreciated. Also, you are able to appreciate much of what we wish to offer, which creates a feeling of "clicking." But you don't just see us as a walking handout, you still see us as ourselves (type 4 emphasis on authenticity). I think in general you tend to encourage us to be ourselves, which goes along with countering the superego. Actually 2's deeply want to just relax and be ourselves, be unguarded... part of our connection with our own inner 4 that we need to regain. There's also a bit of fascination/mystery/challenge to discovering you, your inner world, and a feeling of being very special to be allowed inside there. So there are a few things fwiw.
2w1 - ENFP
Thanks so much for this insight, I can definately see this side to the twos I've known, although I've often ruined this dynamic by not being present enough or being too pre-occupied with myself. |
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sp 2w1 vs sp2w3
