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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
 Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 07:46:19 AM
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No more dairy.
No more sugar.
Work out in the mornings.
Go to bed early, and at the same time every night.
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 07:49:18 AM
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 07:52:13 AM
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First day at my new job... In 4 hours.
I'm napping at lunch fo sho.
Or maybe I just go straight through... |
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 08:04:11 AM
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I'm nervous and scared.
It's gunna be okay.
I'm going to make money, help people, and make new friends.
I won't be alone all day most days anymore.
I can do this. Baby steps, I'm building my life back up. I am strong.
Failure does not define me. Brush my shoulders off. I've got this.
I'm wearing a cute outfit and I'm having peanut butter as part of my breakfast. Short commute. Gay guy with the amazing briefcase. Nice boss. Friend Michelle. Chill office. First day-- like the first day of school. Just show up. Shake hands. Listen. Nod. Yes. Uh huh, I'm so smart and I work hard.
I've got this. |
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 08:06:10 AM
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2 hours of sleep. I'll be okay. This past 6 months ive slept enough for a lifetime.
Donald trump and Martha Stewart only get 5 hours/night.
Er... Bad examples. They're both a bit nuts.
Anyway, I've got this. |
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Cytokine
Member
10060 Posts |
Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 08:06:41 AM
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How do dairy products negatively impact you, Lake?
1w9 sp/sx Obsessive Compulsive
"Corpus omne perseverare in statu suo quiescendi vel movendi uniformiter in directum, nisi quatenus a viribus impressis cogitur statum illum mutare."
Isaacus Newtonus |
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 10:56:30 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Cytokine
How do dairy products negatively impact you, Lake?
1w9 sp/sx Obsessive Compulsive
"Corpus omne perseverare in statu suo quiescendi vel movendi uniformiter in directum, nisi quatenus a viribus impressis cogitur statum illum mutare."
Isaacus Newtonus
I've seen the studies that have come out debunking the claim that dairy increases phlegm production, but i feel it does for me.
I decrease sugar as well when I feel I may be getting sick to help give my immune system that much better of a chance.
My skin also improves immensely when I lower my dairy and sugar intake.
Sugar and cheese are two of my vices
You? |
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 09 Jul 2012 : 10:58:31 PM
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... And it's only 8pm but I'm going to bed.  |
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whitelila
Member
5127 Posts |
Posted - 10 Jul 2012 : 12:41:39 PM
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The ketchup turned out to be a substance that increased eroticism for the masses. They were squirting it down their throats, kissing obscenely in public. The woman had a fat round tongue and the man had a long serpentine one, writhing over hers in the ketchup.. slow motion, I'll have to talk to the director of my dreams, the slow motions was over kill. The people who lived on the streets, they looked old and dirty, skin hanging, flapping old skin, flapping as they had public sex in Ketchup, I was thankful not to be one of them, human, the slow rott.
the woman with 8 dogs had thin arms. Very thin, i felt i could break them but she held me.. held me until my phone woke me up.
to life immortal. |
Edited by - whitelila on 10 Jul 2012 1:04:47 PM |
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 10 Jul 2012 : 4:57:10 PM
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It's pretty soon to say but so far I love my new work! Everyone WANTS to be here, one, and two, they are also genuinely interested in improving public health.
Today I had lunch with the other people in my department, and we talked about their past experience and future plans (in the organization we're at, and outside) and felt touched and excited to be part of such an amazing group. I am thrilled to be able to work with them and learn from one another now, and to see where we all end up!
It's kinda 2-ish self ego flattery, yes, but whatever. I dig.
Im feeling more and more like I did leave my past life for a reason, and that many good things are coming. |
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Fleets
Member
1076 Posts |
Posted - 10 Jul 2012 : 5:43:03 PM
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quartz
Member
1510 Posts |
Posted - 10 Jul 2012 : 6:04:05 PM
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| Lake, that's exciting! Yay |
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Lake
Member
6829 Posts |
Posted - 10 Jul 2012 : 7:06:21 PM
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Thanks, ladies! I'm feeling energized.
Im likely going to stop writing my life story on here now, but I just wanted to follow through reporting back my good news after using this place for quite a while now to lament my bad.
This reminds me I have to send out some emails 
Xoxo |
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Cytokine
Member
10060 Posts |
Posted - 10 Jul 2012 : 9:24:47 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Lake
I've seen the studies that have come out debunking the claim that dairy increases phlegm production, but i feel it does for me.
I decrease sugar as well when I feel I may be getting sick to help give my immune system that much better of a chance.
My skin also improves immensely when I lower my dairy and sugar intake.
Sugar and cheese are two of my vices
You?
Some forms of dairy are high in saturated fat and cholesterol. However, 1% milk seems to be within acceptable limits, and that's the main form of dairy in my diet.
As for refined sucrose i.e. added sugar, I don't consume it in any way. When I'm shopping, I read a product's label, and if it has it among its ingredients, I just put it back down and never look at it again.
I don't know if sugar is the villain some make of it, but I don't need it in my diet. My blood gets all the glucose it needs from brown rice, without the wild fluctuation in blood-sugar levels that foods with added sugar often induce, and with fiber, vitamins and minerals that they often do not provide.
As for having particular foods vices - maybe sodium from traditional foods like miso, shoyu, seaweed and pickled plum. But since I don't eat a lot of processed food my sodium intake is probably lower than average over-all, even if not within recommendations.
1w9 sp/sx Obsessive Compulsive
"Corpus omne perseverare in statu suo quiescendi vel movendi uniformiter in directum, nisi quatenus a viribus impressis cogitur statum illum mutare."
Isaacus Newtonus |
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whitelila
Member
5127 Posts |
Posted - 11 Jul 2012 : 2:10:03 PM
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I won 20 free lessons at skycandy!
that is like winning $300.
I'm thrilled.
This woman has a body type a bit like mine (when i'm at my best weight).. so i could do this, i think. If i put the work in, anyway.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4NwNFBmyCk&feature=related
But god, I'm going to have to stretch!
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Edited by - whitelila on 11 Jul 2012 2:54:26 PM |
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Crooner
Member
USA
5408 Posts |
Posted - 11 Jul 2012 : 2:39:05 PM
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I recently signed up with the local In-Shape health club.
Did my Leg Workout today.
Now I’m hanging out in their lounge, which has free WIFI.
Might just spend more time here…
writing the Great American Novel or something.
Anyway, it looks like I’ll be getting my money’s worth
out of this health club.
Crooner
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whitelila
Member
5127 Posts |
Posted - 11 Jul 2012 : 2:46:55 PM
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yeah, I have had moments of being in perfect shape (my personal ideal self).. this is not one of them.
I'm wanting to be beautiful again. I have been a grub worm for too long. |
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whitelila
Member
5127 Posts |
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quartz
Member
1510 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jul 2012 : 11:45:59 AM
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| When I have something I want to express or explain and can't figure out how to convey it clearly to the person I want to communicate it to.... I feel really frustrated and helpless. |
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whitelila
Member
5127 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jul 2012 : 12:43:25 PM
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| Misery Is The River Of The World = is a perfect song for squats. |
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lovemyth
Member
USA
2934 Posts |
Posted - 22 Jul 2012 : 05:34:16 AM
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i miss my long intense nights, trying to rip some vision out of my head and plaster it onto paper. i miss when drunkeness had a purpose. to make it that much easier, lubrication- lubricating the path to some, i'm sure, brilliant birth.
now i am a vision of the pathetic.
gross, bloated- body overwhelmed with a pregnacy that will not come.
i still drink. too much. lush, alcholic. i'd rather lush be attributed. seems more proper. a bit more respectable.
but despite my desires i am a drunk. a 30 something drunk unable to write for the last 10 years and still holding onto the idea of being a writer.
lies. by a thread maybe- but i haven;t thought of myself as a wrtier in at least ahlf that time past.
i should be.
i should have been.
i rememebr picking at my hair, fervently. jumped up on some concept. breathless and agitated at my desire for words to express. jacked up and high on something so important.
and drunkeneness had a purpose
as did gettin high but i wouldn;t know much about that today. i miss it but haven;t tasted it for over a year due to work.
and chain smoking, when chain smoking was a thing and not a habit. an expression of urgency. that nervous high consumption- imbibing- becuase it was juts right there and needed a push.
becuase there was something there and it needed a celebration present at it's arrival.
i have arrived.
i miss the days when anything i did somehow, in some youth intoxication- meant something. everything did. every movemnt purposeful, meanaiful. just somethin.
i have come now. fully into my own.
total and whole.
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"If you’re going through hell, keep going" |
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lovemyth
Member
USA
2934 Posts |
Posted - 22 Jul 2012 : 05:50:02 AM
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bf freaked out at my thoughts on my last suicide wishes.
it's always that way.
he was gonna call the hospital.
i tried to tell him. it's always that way.
granted it's been about 6 yrs since it's surprised me enough to examine it.
i was surprised. i didnt understand the necessary positve pyschcal with the negative mental emotional.
it was new to me and i was curious about it. and i deal with it in the immediate. maybe going forward as if?
but i had it too many years ago. when all i could i see in my minds eyes was a big red splattter. of my face blown open by a gunshot.
it scared me then as this scared me now.
but knowing myself- in the end despite the possibles. i know it means nothing. ii will still live, becuase that is what so far what i have done.
maybe eventually i won't. i don;t know what this thing will do to me. if it will ever capture me.
but i just needed to talk. to say as i felt it in the momemt. and in the moment it was probably scary. but knowing me. it should;t have been. because i never do. becuase it is just a little twist on the suicidal ideation. it moves.
i worry if it moves all the way. but more i'm curious about how it presnts, why should i feel this way? (yes i did just do that)
and i'd like to see it if it ever comes. i' want to be with it and with my history all the way- and in that understand it.
where is the point of breaking. i don;t know. maybe never will. but hell it's part of me. might as well expolre it.
yadda yadda etc ect
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"If you’re going through hell, keep going" |
Edited by - lovemyth on 22 Jul 2012 05:55:23 AM |
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relicquery
Member
1499 Posts |
Posted - 22 Jul 2012 : 12:58:24 PM
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When they say he was always quiet, a loner, seemed like a normal guy, I imagine that the narcissistic sociopath they're referring to snapped after being treated as ordinary and overlookable for too long. Couldn't handle being mediocre, and didn't have the capacity for empathy that might give all that creativity and PhD smarts a humane outlet.
"Always seemed like such a nice person" = "Completely unremarkable."
Maybe empathy can make all the difference between a brilliant idea and a calculated mass murder. I don't know. Most CEOs of big, big companies have more than a little sociopath to them, but they also wield a lot of power, and their crimes mostly remain white-collar (so they get away with destroying lives because their hands look so rich and clean).
Maybe the recipe goes like this:
Take 1 Sociopath, add intelligence and narcissism, liberally. Surround with a lack of being appreciated as Special enough and beat with a sense of perceived powerlessness. Glaze with isolation to bring out the sociopath's inherent lack of connectivity. Let stew at room temperature for around twenty years, give or take. Result: one mass murderer. |
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dfgray44
Member
USA
11094 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jul 2012 : 08:19:32 AM
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quote:
Originally posted by May Hem
I hate the theater murderer with a passion but I do not understand why he with every opportunity would become so engaged with a macabre representation of reality.
It's about self-actualization and accomplishment. That it took place in a theater is apropos metaphor. He was drawing a thick black-line border around a dramatic moment of pure self-expression. A moment that's solidified as his. His own personal aesthetic framed by the 'theater curtains' and the stage/screen; transforming a moment into an object/fetish.
A strike against Nature/Reality/Time. The mundane churning liquid flux of human bodies -- working, going to the grocery store, eating, shitting, dying...and reproducing more people who will all do the same, ad infinitum.
His is an attempt at a shortcut to the top of Maslow's hierarchy.
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MH
Member
12309 Posts |
Posted - 23 Jul 2012 : 08:26:24 AM
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| well thats all fine and dandy dfgray. You know what he reminds me of? disfiguration. eat, [blocked], and die.Or alternately if you cant take the heat leave the [blocked]n kitchen |
Edited by - MH on 23 Jul 2012 08:30:09 AM |
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