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sappy
Member
1341 Posts |
 Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 11:25:18 AM
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When did you met in person, lake and gray?
Where there any kinky details that need to be adressed?
I bet Gray lure her into the abyss that is the eidb.. |
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Glasgow
Member
Germany
5839 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:08:38 PM
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Euro 2012
Germany-Netherlands 2-1
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:10:37 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by May Hem
Jol I believe you are talking about me when discussing the mental illness aspect. I experienced Glasgow as very caring in his comments and did not experience any negative or hostile correlations tho i think i get where you are coming from. Your conversation and interaction has totally degraded with him and i dont understand why he experiences your thoughts and communication from such a hostile stance. Its pretty confusing for me
No May Hem. I was specifically thinking about something he said about eidbuser (and there were others). I don't remember him diagnosing you.
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Edited by - sunny on 14 Jun 2012 1:33:12 PM |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:23:46 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Lake
i have a feeling you both would be able to appreciate one another as people with something valuable to contribute if you could get past this issue.
Actually I like Glasgow. But he's doing the same thing Kate and BADMAN have done. He's projecting the same things onto me that both of them have in the past, and it says something about their similarities. I've liked all of them and all of them have misread my intentions toward them.
I'm not the one who started this btw.
unfortunately, the way in which the issue is expressed by and between you two then ads to the issue.
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Edited by - sunny on 14 Jun 2012 1:22:00 PM |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:26:46 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
lake,
i have no problem anymore to see her as a 4.
start reading.
btw i was the one who said in this thread that he is a very manipulative 9 and next day she changed to 4.
It sounds like you're taking credit for something that had nothing at all to do with you.
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:32:03 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
quote:
Originally posted by sunny
quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
quote:
Originally posted by sunny
...The truth about the emails...I emailed you with my thoughts. ..
I said I wouldn't make my thoughts public, so you asked me to email you about it. I thought that was worth a try, but then your response was that my opinions were "negative". And now you're using the whole thing to get revenge. That's pretty low...
...That's your perception, but don't you think it's possible that I'm both soft/innocent and aggressive. Is that so hard to believe? Do you need to see people as one way or the other?
no, i didnt asked you. you mailed me without my invitation.
It's a matter of public record that you asked me to discuss thomg's type off board. Everyone who read that thread knows the truth. I emailed you...at your request.
no, after you had sent me your email backbiting about thom full of hatred i stated in this thread that we mail.
it is incredible how manipulative you are again.
You call me manipulative when it's you who twists and distorts the information...not me.
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:33:38 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
lake, it credits you that youre trying to help jol.
though im discussing that with jol. not with you. understand?
thanks
This is an open forum...anyone can give input as far as I'm concerned.
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:54:47 PM
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[quote]Originally posted by sunny
[quote]Originally posted by Glasgow
I emailed you because I didn't want my thoughts to be public. thomg said he didn't want his type discussed on the board. If you post private emails, you will lose respect.
then tell the truth and stop telling lies and manipulating.
I don't see mayself as lying. I see you needing to distort information in order to maintain control.
If I had been nice and sweet to thomg, and then turned around and emailed the opposite to you, you could call me "hypocrite" and "back stabbing", but that's not what happened. Calling me those things is slanderous.
hypocrite because you critizised aggressive typing discussions and played the victim of insults , sneaked and manipulated in the background again and again and then i was locked .
Now I understand what's really bothering you.
Don't blame that on me.
Take responsibility for your own aggression. You are reactive and vengeful and that gets you in trouble.
People are, more or less.
no, you are a kind of fake personality by my standards of honesty with all your manipulations. this is the point.
Pathologizing and vengence-seeking....again.
ps: btw this kind of discussion with you is sickening. though it seems to be your world..
It sickens me too. I don't enjoy being called names...no matter what you think. Your judgements and your harassment make me sick.
victimhood. your favorite manipulation if your other manipulations don't work. always the same crap.
I've said all I have to say, and I feel the same...always the same crap.
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 12:59:19 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
quote:
Originally posted by May Hem
quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
yeah, may hem, i remember you were saying that you probably have psd.and i just referred to it one time or so.
right?
yes right. And I experienced you as very calm and caring. Maybe it was different from your pov. Im always trying to understand communication
you are the opposite of jol imo. you are a very honest person. simple as that.
There you go...May=All Good, JoL=All bad. How realistic is that?
That's very black and white.
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 1:08:24 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
i wanna fight for the truth, lake. this is my point of view.
Don't kid yourself Glasgow. Your only purpose is revenge.
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 1:29:10 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Lake
i have a feeling you both would be able to appreciate one another as people with something valuable to contribute if you could get past this issue.
Getting along isn't the goal for either one of us.
unfortunately, the way in which the issue is expressed by and between you two then ads to the issue.
Sometimes conflict is the only way to get to insight. I don't want to smooth things over.
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 2:42:53 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
i guess, it's confusing for you, may hem,
because as a whole she has the ability to give an innocent vibe and therefore wraps people around her finger.
she is uncredible manipulative. irl i dont know this kind of people. i only saw these kind of people on tv in soaps or movies.
[/quote]
I agree that in the past I've hidden a lot of myself in order to protect myself from shame. It's been going on since I was very young and I haven't been conscious of the degree of it. It's something I've become more aware of recently.
By nature I'm expressive and emotional, but those qualities were ridiculed and shamed by my mother who emotionally repeatedly abandoned me. There seemed to be hope with my father but he was excessively critical and gradually I lost any hope of connecting with either of them.
I felt completely alone and perpetually sad, pained and hurt by the world. I shut down and when I did engage with the world, I only allowed a certain part of myself to show. Not that it was totally "false" either...it was part of me, but only a very small part.
Being myself triggers shame but at the same time, I'm compelled to express myself.
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Veiled One
Member
5590 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 2:46:54 PM
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That jol has a Two fix (and not a Four fix) is coming to me clearer and clearer day by day.
I will hit and run, yet again, so don't except me to engage in prolonged arguments.  |
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Glasgow
Member
Germany
5839 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 3:06:07 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Veiled One
That jol has a Two fix (and not a Four fix) is coming to me clearer and clearer day by day.
I will hit and run, yet again, so don't except me to engage in prolonged arguments.
trifix? stacking?
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Stormy
Member
United Kingdom
15282 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 3:17:53 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by sunny
Perhaps this is why no 9w1 is more pushy and assertive when it comes to merging. When they do, it's as if they are totally blind to any boundary between themselves and the other.
I'm like that sometimes with some people, but I see it as a 2 thing in my case.
As in, something you do when less Healthy/Disintegrating?
- [Stormy] |
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dusty
Member
2897 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 3:28:45 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Veiled One
That jol has a Two fix (and not a Four fix) is coming to me clearer and clearer day by day.
I will hit and run, yet again, so don't except me to engage in prolonged arguments.
oh whatever, Jol has a 4 fix, although her being a 4w5 sp/sx is pretty laughable to me. |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 3:33:45 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Veiled One
That jol has a Two fix (and not a Four fix) is coming to me clearer and clearer day by day.
I will hit and run, yet again, so don't except me to engage in prolonged arguments.
I have developed a connection to 2 over the years. I took care of younger siblings, became a mother at a young age and then (by process of elimination) I became a nurse. That's the part of myself that I'm comfortable showing to the world and it's also what others are mistaking for 9ness.
Early on I wondered if I might be some kind of 2 and asked a teacher about it. She sort of laughed and said, "No."
To argue against core 2:
I don't reach out and offer caretaking in the world, and I resent being expected to do things for others. I want to spend my time doing other things. I honeslty don't even enjoy taking care of my grandchildren....I'm distracted by where my mind wants to go and where I'd rather be.
I work as a nurse, but unless the setting is extremely stimulating (crisis unit for example), I dislike it. I limit my work to part-time...just enough to survive financially.
I don't see myself as a "mama" to others...not at all. I don't take pride in taking care of others. I don't feel important in the lives of others...and if I do feel important...I quickly do something to let the person know that I don't want to be depended on.
I hate being touched and I'm uncomfortable feeling physically or emotionally close to others when it happens. (A lover would be the exception, and then I'm looking for a rescuer more than looking to take care of anyone.)
I'm self-absorbed would prefer to not work at all. I've stayed in jobs where drama was the draw and I've changed jobs frequently because I can't stand boredom. When things are mundane I get depressed. Ultimately, what I'm looking for is juice and self-understanding. As I get older, and I'm not as physically strong and not looking for stimulation to the degree that I used to, I want to spend all of my time alone studying.
This is the best description I've ever seen and it describes me and my messed up life to a T:
http://www.enneagramcentral.com/Enneagram/Subtypes/Subtype%20Four%20Self%20Preservation.htm
I'd be a very strange 2, and can't see 2 as my core type at all.
No extroverted feeling
No big issues with pride (which always seems "funny" when I see it in others.)
No problems seeing the worst/dark in myself
No desire to be important to others
etc, etc.
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Edited by - sunny on 14 Jun 2012 4:00:44 PM |
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Stormy
Member
United Kingdom
15282 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:08:31 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by sunny
To argue against core 2:
I don't reach out and offer caretaking in the world, and I resent being expected to do things for others.
E2 doesn't necessarily manifests as caretaking per se, although it does involve an implicit belief that love has to be earned.
quote:
Originally posted by sunny
This is the best description I've ever seen and it describes me to a T:
http://www.enneagramcentral.com/Enneagram/Subtypes/Subtype%20Four%20Self%20Preservation.htm
For how long, though?
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- [Stormy] |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:09:31 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Stormy
quote:
Originally posted by sunny
Perhaps this is why no 9w1 is more pushy and assertive when it comes to merging. When they do, it's as if they are totally blind to any boundary between themselves and the other.
I'm like that sometimes with some people, but I see it as a 2 thing in my case.
As in, something you do when less Healthy/Disintegrating?
- [Stormy]
Yes. I'm isolated but I want a lot of closeness from the people I get close to. Also, with certain patients I can merge in an emotional way too. It may not be "unhealthy" exactly though.
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Edited by - sunny on 14 Jun 2012 4:10:59 PM |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:17:28 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Stormy
quote:
Originally posted by sunny
To argue against core 2:
I don't reach out and offer caretaking in the world, and I resent being expected to do things for others.
E2 doesn't necessarily manifests as caretaking per se, although it does involve an implicit belief that love has to be earned.
quote:
Originally posted by sunny
This is the best description I've ever seen and it describes me to a T:
http://www.enneagramcentral.com/Enneagram/Subtypes/Subtype%20Four%20Self%20Preservation.htm
For how long, though?
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- [Stormy]
Since I was a small child, and I could give lots of examples of how I was dauntless/reckless even as a kid...and for my whole life (until I forced myself to stop for the sake of my health).
As I've gotten older I've been experiencing the results of that lifestyle and I've made changes, but I've also experienced a lot of depression related to having to live a mundane life.
I've always said that I wasn't seeking "peace". That's an understatement. I've cared about excitement, "juice" and stimuation as well as "finding" myself.
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Edited by - sunny on 14 Jun 2012 4:19:32 PM |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:22:45 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Stormy
E2 doesn't necessarily manifests as caretaking per se, although it does involve an implicit belief that love has to be earned.
I don't have the belief that I can earn love. I earn money by taking care of people, but underneath it all I believe I'm too flawed to be loved, no matter what I do.
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Edited by - sunny on 14 Jun 2012 4:27:00 PM |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:44:06 PM
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Here's something from Tom Condon that I related to: I do think I'm a 4 with a developed 2 (more than 1, although I see both):
"Four's Connection to Two:
Low side brings dependency. Tendency to fixate on a loved one. Whiny demandingness and blame. Codependent melodrama when the real person behaves differently than the Four expects them to. Think they can't live without the other. Twoish capacity to empathize becomes compulsive. Fours can't help but identify, especially with others' pain. Takes beloved person inside of they subjectivity, making that person their salvation. They may flee themselves by serving others. Prideful sense of specialness is also intensified. Hysterical illness possible."
All of that is true for me, but the highlighted area is something I've noticed here on the EIDB...and it's something I felt ashamed of when it was brought to my attention (by Kate specifically).
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Stormy
Member
United Kingdom
15282 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:44:07 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by sunny
I've cared about excitement, "juice" and stimuation as well as "finding" myself.
Have you generally perceived excitement, "juice", and stimulation as being separate from "finding" yourself?
- [Stormy] |
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Lake
Member
6777 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:49:09 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Glasgow
quote:
...because I kinda like you...
you like my body, especially my long
feet.
We'll have to agree to disagree on that matter. |
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sunny
Member
USA
9398 Posts |
Posted - 14 Jun 2012 : 4:57:47 PM
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quote:
Originally posted by Stormy
quote:
Originally posted by sunny
I've cared about excitement, "juice" and stimuation as well as "finding" myself.
Have you generally perceived excitement, "juice", and stimulation as being separate from "finding" yourself?
- [Stormy]
There is always finding-self going on, and developing self awareness is has a "juicy" feeling.
In addition to that, I have trouble living life in the way that others do. I get depressed when there is no excitement and when life/others impose on me the need to earn a living and be responsible.
The stuff I must do in order to do stay alive in this society...I feel I should not have to do any of it. I have better things to do. I often break rules, because I feel like I'm "different" and have a right to. I evade responsibility and feel I deserve to do exactly as I want in the moment, especially because I suffer from depression.
I had a crappy childhood...I wasn't given what others were given...and so now I have the right to have nothing expected of me.
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Edited by - sunny on 14 Jun 2012 5:04:37 PM |
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Topic |
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TYPES of the MEMBERS who want to be typed II
